Monday, May 10, 2004
Cheesecake Scam
It came up in conversation again over the weekend, so I figure I might as well share with the world my own personal take on the Cheesecake Factory.
It starts with the name. They name themselves "The Cheesecake Factory" so that you think they have good cheesecake. In reality, their cheesecake is mediocre (They do have a lot of variety and gussy it up nice, but it's mainly just whip cream and flavorful swirls. I've been to Brooklyn. I know what good cheesecake is.). Most people at any other restaurant, when the waiter asks if you'd like to see the dessert menu, say, "No thanks." But at the Cheesecake Factory every customer says to himself, "This is the Cheesecake Factory. We HAVE to get cheesecake for dessert." And they do. So every customer takes longer than average to finish their meal.
So it's no wonder that it's always a two hour wait to get in. They just can't turn around tables as fast as a regular restaurant. The exceedingly long lines outside make passersby (and maybe even some of the waiting people themselves) think to themselves, "Hey, this looks like a really popular eating establishment. It must be really good. There's no other reason so many people would be waiting to get in at 6:00 on a Wednesday."
The fact that they can't get as many people in as a regular restaurant causes them to charge you more money for your meal, but in an effort to appease the masses, they just increase the size of the portions so you can justify spending $15 on a burger because it's a REALLY BIG BURGER. With economies of scale, though, it doesn't cost the restaurant that much more to give you a really big burger, and you're just going to put half of it in a doggie bag and find it kinda yucky tomorrow. Meanwhile, it takes you longer to attempt to eat the amount of food they give you, which compounds the line-waiting problem described above.
Finally, once you are seated, you've been waiting so long that you could eat your own shoes. So when they put a heck of a lot of mediocre food in front of you, you think it's the tastiest thing in the world, and you're grateful for their large portions and think they have some magical cheesecake-making powers. Your hunger makes you believe the food is very good, which also counteracts the normal reaction people have to overpriced food. $7 for a slice of cheesecake? Sounds steep, but this is CHEESECAKE FACTORY cheesecake. It must be worth it.
It's all an intricate scam based on psychological manipulation, and it has the general public duped. The only good thing I can say about this place is that they have the most comprehensive menu on the planet, and thus can suit a large party of finicky eaters. But just try getting a table for a large party!
It starts with the name. They name themselves "The Cheesecake Factory" so that you think they have good cheesecake. In reality, their cheesecake is mediocre (They do have a lot of variety and gussy it up nice, but it's mainly just whip cream and flavorful swirls. I've been to Brooklyn. I know what good cheesecake is.). Most people at any other restaurant, when the waiter asks if you'd like to see the dessert menu, say, "No thanks." But at the Cheesecake Factory every customer says to himself, "This is the Cheesecake Factory. We HAVE to get cheesecake for dessert." And they do. So every customer takes longer than average to finish their meal.
So it's no wonder that it's always a two hour wait to get in. They just can't turn around tables as fast as a regular restaurant. The exceedingly long lines outside make passersby (and maybe even some of the waiting people themselves) think to themselves, "Hey, this looks like a really popular eating establishment. It must be really good. There's no other reason so many people would be waiting to get in at 6:00 on a Wednesday."
The fact that they can't get as many people in as a regular restaurant causes them to charge you more money for your meal, but in an effort to appease the masses, they just increase the size of the portions so you can justify spending $15 on a burger because it's a REALLY BIG BURGER. With economies of scale, though, it doesn't cost the restaurant that much more to give you a really big burger, and you're just going to put half of it in a doggie bag and find it kinda yucky tomorrow. Meanwhile, it takes you longer to attempt to eat the amount of food they give you, which compounds the line-waiting problem described above.
Finally, once you are seated, you've been waiting so long that you could eat your own shoes. So when they put a heck of a lot of mediocre food in front of you, you think it's the tastiest thing in the world, and you're grateful for their large portions and think they have some magical cheesecake-making powers. Your hunger makes you believe the food is very good, which also counteracts the normal reaction people have to overpriced food. $7 for a slice of cheesecake? Sounds steep, but this is CHEESECAKE FACTORY cheesecake. It must be worth it.
It's all an intricate scam based on psychological manipulation, and it has the general public duped. The only good thing I can say about this place is that they have the most comprehensive menu on the planet, and thus can suit a large party of finicky eaters. But just try getting a table for a large party!
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